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I came from the generation where online dating was for people who couldn’t get a date to save their life. That’s why I’m troubled it’s starting to be accepted in society as shown by the ad on the right. I know for a fact that she’s not “waiting for you” or anyone else who doesn’t have a website like mine. If you can’t get a girl like that in real life, why would she be looking for you online? Girls like that don’t fall for guys based on their skill of paying for an online dating service.
What I want to know is why are people continually falling for ads like this? I really don’t understand it. Finding love from an online dating service just isn’t legit like the “Making Money From Home” program I recently joined. By the way, it obviously works because they wouldn’t charge $399 if it didn’t.
I think it would be interesting to see the demographics of people who sign up for online dating services. Membership probably includes hundreds of thousands of males and the six ugliest women in the world. As a test, I put up a personal ad as a “hot blonde teen looking for fun” with ambitious hobbies such as “braiding my arm pit hair, shopping with your money, and attending post-operative transsexual support group meetings.” My account was suspended because the inbox was too full of replies. You can’t blame them for trying, but really guys, it was just a joke. Stop emailing me pictures of your genitals.
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8 Comments to "You Are Going To Die A Virgin"
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sorry about those pictures i sent
Well, I can tell you why I’ve dated online:
1) I don’t drink. It seems the largest place to meet people is in bars/nightclubs and I don’t go to bars or nightclubs. I’m not a fan of music in general so there’s really no point in going.
2) I’d rather go out with someone I met online than someone I’d meet in a bar. Since I don’t consider going to bars “fun”, I don’t want to date someone who considers that a good time.
3) You actually get to talk to people online. Conversations in bars tend to boil down to
“W…hds…eee..hrr…”
“WHAT?!?!?!”
“I SAID… ‘W…hds…eee…hrr…’”
Heaven forbid that you actually get a chance to talk to another human being.
Nick - I’m sorry too lol
Jordan - I agree that going to a bar is not the right place to meet a girl if you’re looking for a real relationship, however, I don’t think meeting new people is as simple as either you go to bars or resort to dating online. There’s plenty of other places to meet nice girls without going to a bar.
Jordan - you must be too ugly to get a date with a girl that sees you, or maybe you can’t hold a conversation for shit. Whatever it is, you are destined to be alone…forever.
Heaven forbid, if the bar is the only place I can get a date, then I better ditch the girl I have now because I got her at the wrong place. Thats not hip at all.
[…] and without question, the toilet seat is always up. Somewhere along the way, if you don’t die a virgin, you’ll probably end up married and living with a woman. You will discover that resistance is […]
I met my current girlfriend in a bar. Not only is she gorgeous, she’s always up for a game of quarters or a Jagger shot and truly enjoys eff’n like a crazy freakazoid til the rooster crows. Plus, she cooks and cleans on occassion. I mean ask yourself, what more could a guy want!
Jordan, go straight down to your local pub, put some Judas Priest, Thin Lizzy or perhaps some Skynered on and “turn it up.” Then, proceed to slam three brews as you shake your money maker. Soon, you too will have a hot new chick and will no longer feel like a dick!. Party on
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