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I bet you didn’t know that today is the worst day of your life. Don’t worry, that’s what I’m here for. It’s widely known that college is the “best time of your life.” That means if you didn’t go to college, not only are you making less money throughout your life, but you also didn’t have as much fun. Sucks to be you but someone has to do it. I’m glad it’s you and not me.

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